At least, not the ones that cover shit you have absolutely no interest in. Human Subjects Protection: a powerful-sounding title, full of mind-numbing bureaucrats with tired, thin jokes.

 

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I try to tune out the beige walls, the beige and brown carpet, the white tablecloths and burned, Brand X coffee….I find that even my desire to write has been numbed–my lust for creativity dulled by figures and the keynote speaker’s attempts at jokes that only an engineer would create.

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To be fair, they are now talking about journeying to Mars–that holds promise (I’ve seen Doctor Who, people, I know how this ends). However, eventually they will turn back to the boring, the demure, the twenty-minute arguments over whether to use “assist” or “help” in a consent form.

Maybe if I keep on typing I’ll look like I’m actually interested…maybe if I pound enough caffeine, I’ll manage to stay awake…